​

​

 

If you think about your life – What are the things you would label as normal?

What are you proud of?

 

I once sat down with someone, who told me that she couldn’t be proud of anything that she is doing. When I mentioned some of the things, that I thought she could be proud of she said: “That’s just normal to me, I can’t be proud of that.”

That moment was shocking and eye opening at the same time – also it wasn’t the only time I had a conversation like that.

I noticed that this person was expecting a lot from herself. She was demanding so much that she was only focused on the things she didn’t do. She fed her inner critic, by telling herself that what she was doing was not enough, while putting all the things she was doing, or that made her who she is in the “normal box”.

We are so trained to consider things as “normal”, that we stop appreciating them, or even stop to allow us to be proud of certain things. Society might have taught us, that there are things, that we all must fulfill, that we must do or some ways we have to be, until we start considering them as “normal”. We choose to only look at the things that we can’t do, that we don’t have, or that we aren’t, instead of looking at the things we are actually doing, that we could be proud of. But instead of taking moments of appreciation, or thankfulness, we rather choose to feed our inner critic, with telling ourselves that we aren’t doing enough.  Being on time, being honest, reliable, cleaning our homes, working all day, cooking, feeding families, going grocery shopping, and doing all these things all day – everyday, might be considered as “normal”. But I also see how tiring it can be, doing all these things and so much more all the time - even on difficult days. I see parents working, picking up kids, cleaning their houses, helping the kids with whatever they have to do, or whatever they ask for, while dealing with their own problems, being on time for appointments and handling every situation life throws at them. I see students working several jobs, studying, struggling, and doing all the other chores they have to do at the same time. I see people dealing with sicknesses, but still showing up for everything they feel like they are demanded to do. I talked to people, who were moving to another country without any resources, building a whole new life. I see people being kind to others, even though they are actually having a shitty day. Someone might say “well that’s just normal”, but sometimes doing the “normal” things is not as easy as it sounds. Sometimes doing the “normal” things can be tough. It can be draining.

​

What I’m trying to say is that we could reflect on the things we consider as normal. That we could start going through and sorting out our “normal boxes”. That we take moments to reflect on all the things that we are doing day by day, the things that others do for us and - that we would let that sink in for a minute. That we would take a moment to be grateful and start allowing us to have breaks. That we start being more kind to ourselves and to others. To find moments to be proud of ourselves and others – even for the little things. That we start seeing ourselves and others. That we start seeing and appreciating who we are and what we do.